I don't want to spend a lot of time writing this but I do feel a desire to get this out. So it'll probably be short and fairly unstructured but I don't think anyone will mind or even notice this is here which is kind of the point.
I have existed for quite some time and in that time I have sought to create something... amazing... lasting... worth being seen and fondly remembered. I have dabbled in a great many things from drawings and video, photos and music to stories and poetry... but none of it has ever matter much to anyone. I want to make something worthy of life so that I feel I actually have a reason to be in this world something that affects others in a positive way... something where people will notice that I've done something to make life a little more enjoyable by everyone else. It wouldn't hurt if that something could provide for myself and my family either.
I know that it's unlikely that I, or anyone else, should get any kind of "Christmas wish" but I'd like to go for broke. I know it's cheesy and I really don't think it possible but I really, really would also like Love. It's silly, I guess, but I pushed it aside because I wanted to be successful and the kind of person my "dream girl" would look for in a "dream guy". I know I'm not that guy and given recent revelations it doesn't seem like I ever really will be but it all seems like a package so I thought I'd ask.
Who? Maybe no one... but I plan to keep trying so I can use any help I can get!
I know you can't take away this ailment but please help me find Love and get to a place where I can be the person I know I can be.